Tag: change

Believing…

You know sometimes when you read a book, and some of the words just stay with you.  They haunt you until you can no longer ignore reading them again and again until you either learn what it is you’re supposed to learn, or you realize that you may never understand, but you know in your heart they have changed you.

The  last paragraph in Mitch Albom’s book: “The Stranger in the Lifeboat” has been haunting me for months.

     ”In the end, there is the sea and the land and the news that happens between them. To spread that news we tell each other stories. Sometimes the stories are about survival. And sometimes those stories, like the presence of the Lord, are hard to believe. Unless believing is what makes them true.”

Mitch Albom’s books always touch me. But this – this has stayed with me.  Always there – always lingering.  It’s like a puzzle I’m working on, but I can’t finish it because some of the pieces are missing.

I was sitting in the very back row of my church last week filling the acolyte’s candle lighters for Sunday morning worship, when something made me stop and these words were in my head …”and sometimes, those stories, like the presence of the Lord, are hard to believe. Unless believing is what makes them true.”    

“Unless believing is what makes them true.”

So – if you don’t believe in the presence of the Lord, you aren’t going to believe in anything associated with the Lord. You aren’t going to believe in the power of prayer or miracles, or mercy or grace.  You’re going to say you don’t believe in anything, and yet – you do believe there is nothing to believe in.

It’s not about the presence of the Lord…

And these stories we tell one another to spread the news – it’s all about what we believe that makes them true.  It’s not about the stories – it’s about us – you and I. It’s about who we are and what it is we believe.  Tell the same story – word for word – on MSNBC and FOX – and what you will get are two completely different opinions on what the story was about.  

It’s not about the story…

It’s about good versus evil and what each of us believe to be good or evil.

It’s about the human condition and what each one of us believes needs to be done for the common good.

 It’s about  – do you really believe “and liberty and justice for all” or are you only interested in liberty and justice for what you believe?

It’s not about the presence of God.

It’s not about the stories.

It’s about you.

And it’s about me.

And what it is we believe.

In the end, there is the sea and the land and the news that happens between them. To spread that news we tell each other stories. Sometimes the stories are about survival. And sometimes those stories, like the presence of the Lord, are hard to believe. Unless believing is what makes them true.”

Until Next Time

XOXO

Change…

Change.

I don’t like change.

I don’t like the not knowing part of change.

Yes, I know life is all about change, and that change is good, and everything is constantly changing

Still…

I don’t like change.

And yet – Ever since I stepped into this Hawaiian air – I could feel change.

I know I’m here to learn something.

To feel something.

To release something.

To take responsibility for something.

To hear something.

To accept something.

To receive something.

To trust something.

To believe something.

To welcome something.

To begin something.

To be something.

Until next time…

XOXO

It’s On Me…

Vacations are not always about having fun. Sometimes along with the fun, we find ourselves dealing with things we have purposely placed in the back of our mind and heart because the pain of dealing with any of it is too much to bear.

This is one of those vacations for me.

The shores of the Hawaiian Island of Oahu seemed to know I was coming, and was prepared to show me beauty, the likes of which I have never seen, but the price for all of that splendor, was me breaking down in tears.  It was in those moments of vulnerability, I knew I was here, on this Island, to have my come to Jesus moments with things I have been carrying with me for 3.5 years.

It was terrifying and exciting at the same time.  

I won’t share the depths of my baggage, because it’s mine – but I will speak of the importance of dealing with grief and heartbreak and betrayal and not allowing it to weigh you down and prevent you from living the life you have to live.

We don’t all get a happy ending. Sometimes things just end. What I now understand is that it’s not about the ending – it’s about how I pick up my pieces and carry on. Is it how I envisioned my life to be? No – it is not. But – it is the life I now have.

I thought I was doing good, and in some respects I know I am. But there are so many tentacles to grief. So many facets that if placed aside, they only fester and grow.

These shores and mist covered mountains of Oahu have touched a part of me that’s been stuck.  A part of me I haven’t had the courage to face.

Until now.

I have spent too much time feeling guilty for things over which I had no control. These things that weighed me down and kept me stuck in a life of regrets in what I perceived as broken promises.

I have placed my anger on others and expected that to anger to outweigh my guilt.

Yeah, that’s not how it works. That’s what has kept me weighed down and broken inside.

The truth is this:

 it’s on me to let the guilt go.

It’s on me to set my heart straight.

It’s on me to forgive myself.

It’s on me to focus on the things that I am responsible for changing.

It’s on me.

It’s all on me.

 

Mahalo, Oahu.

Until Next Time…

 

 

Be A Better Human

New Years resolutions are not my thing. It’s just this never-ending battle about what I should do to be better, then starting on that path, then a month later I feel bad about myself for failing once again I mean – what is the point?

What I’ve discovered is that you can change anything in your life on any day of the year.

Any month.

Any week.

Any day.

Any hour.

Any minute.

Any second.

You get my drift.

It’s a matter of deciding that you want to be a better human.

We all get caught up in the minutia of our own lives. It’s human nature. Our purpose though, is to rise above our own state of mind and try and help those who are living a life we can’t even imagine.

It’s not all that hard.

Donate clothes you no longer wear to a homeless shelter.

Donate canned goods to a food bank.

Open a door for someone.

Look people in the eye and talk to them

Don’t judge

Be humble

Smile

If you’re one of those people who complain about how awful the world is and you blame the Republicans or the Democrats or whoever you believe is doing you wrong, and you spend your time tweeting your anger, or making tic-toc videos and spewing your anger on Facebook, and you do absolutely nothing to help anyone…

Just stop.

It’s not all about you.

Is life fair? – No

We all make mistakes, we all suffer, we all grieve, we all stumble, we all say things we can’t take back, we all love, we have all lost someone we loved. Having money doesn’t make you a better person. Nor does your house, your car or your clothes, etc… No one person is better than another.

If you want to make a change this year…

Be a better human.